Recently I have been listening to Tai Lopez's talk and have read a lot of people's blogs about how to get out of the old habits and get successful. This is an age old topic which I have renewed interest in.
Tai, in his talk, mentioned that many people live the life of silent desperation. He repeatedly told us that on average people spend 88% of their time doing something they don't like. He wanted everyone to "tap dance out of bed" every morning to start a day. The key, according to him, is to make passion your work, focus on it, "toughen up", "grind it out", and ignore most of the distractions.
But is it possible to do that?
To take a step back, I respect Tai for lots of reasons. He is a self-made millionaire, from a small town, with no rich parents. Yet he got where he is by learning from the best mentors in the field of business and investment, and by reading books from the most successful people in the world. The advice he gave was not based on his imagination, but were applied and tested. That separated him from a lot of the motivational "talkers". As he mentioned, he did not grow rich by motivating people.
He mentioned a lot of things that struck me, among which his despise for temporary satisfactions or the "distractions" in life. He believe that people have the feeling of "TGIF" because they really hate what they do everyday and the only thing they can hope for is whenever they are not working. That, according to him, is silent desperation. He was also commenting on how his "poor friends" would make a plan for a holiday months ahead, because these were the only things they look forward to in life. Harsh, but maybe true. Similarly, he mentioned how video games made the makers millions of dollars, but is really just a distraction because one doesn't know what to do with life. Thinking of the Clash of Clan and Monster Strike I have been playing, I am guilty as charged.
But how do you find what you should do? He discovered he has a real talent for business consulting and investment when his mentor gave him ~$20,000 for writing an investment analysis for real estate. That discovery was partially due to him taking the initiative to go to New Zealand to visit his mentor, and because he "grinded it out" working in difficult jobs such as sheering sheep when in there. More importantly, he knew somewhere in himself that he would be good doing business.
But while it seems like doing business is the only way of getting financial independence and escape 9-5, am I good at doing business? Will I be good doing investment? My mom trades stocks, but it is more a hobby than a career. I have earned about 6% return on my investment of $5000 in Google stocks last year. I did have a good mindset of waiting for the stock to rise and not get too impulsive about it. But is that an indication that I am going to do well in stock trading? I don't know. And I have tried doing business selling clothes in the market before when I was in New Zealand, which I end up losing NZ$600. When I was doing the business, I was stubborn and I don't listen to people's advice. And a lot of times when I had to bargain with shoppers in the market, all I was thinking was "what is the point" or "Why would I care about 2 bucks". So will I be good in business? I don't know.
Tai talked about knowing your own talent. Basically you ask yourself several questions:
1. Who do you grow up around? What do your parents do?
2. What do you have experience for 10 years and more?
3. What do strangers complement you on? Especially what do your enemy complement you on?
4. On a Saturday night, what can you talk with your friends about for hours on end?
Similarly, Simon Somlai summarized that we feel into the trap that "we can be anything we want", but in fact, if you try to "add talent where little exist", it will not work out. Instead, we should invest heavily in our talents, which will amplify our achievements (Link).
So for me, I grow up with my Dad who is a government official, and my Mom who is an editor of a journal. Both of them are intellectual. I have experience of studying science for more than 10 years and psychology for about 7 years. Other than that, I can solve common computer issues and strangers complement me on my technical skills, besides more shallow things such as appearances or way of dressing. I can talk with my friends about politics and culture differences for a long time.
From all these, it is still difficult to identify a pattern. It seems that I should do more technical work, but my friend Frank who is a CFO at a bank really advise against me about going to anything support. From his perspective, it is not good money and certainly not a good option for someone who has invested in school for so long. I can potentially get into investing stocks. That option is yet to be explored. Giving the "quiet analytical skills" I have, it probably would work better if what I am good at and I am trained on is sitting there at looking at numbers and charts. I am also happy with teaching. I could explain things, especially technical information in layman's term. I used to tutor clients how to use Excel or Word. I once tried to get into that field, but I was basically told that you become a teacher when you "are an expert at X". You don't JUST teach, but if you are good at JAVA programming, you go teach programming. If you are good at network engineering, you go teach network engineering. What I can teach, up till now, is intro psychology. I was thinking that teaching GRE quantitative may also be a good option, giving my natural advantage. Maybe I can make an US version of the New Oriental school (China) that gives crazy tips to prepare students to excel in GRE.
Overall, I feel this exploration is just in time. Tai mentioned that when people show signs of depression, it is their body's reaction saying "Hey man, you need to change up. This isn't working." When people feel not energetic at life, it is either that they are not putting enough effort, or they are not doing what they are supposed to be doing. So for this, I am glad that I had this mental exercise today. It is a good start indeed.
